How do you write terminally ill?

A few people have asked me, "how do you write," and then they'll either ask about the different races and cultures in the book or about my main character. In particular, some wonder how do you write the terminally ill if you aren't terminally ill yourself. Well, if you think about, we're all headed there... some of us a little slower than others, but in the end we all kick the same bucket.

I take what is, and I multiply it to get the sense of failing health and the depression that comes along with it. If writers know one thing it's depression, and man do I have lots of it! I'm broke and struggling every month just to make ends meet.  Normally I would sort of just sulk in this negative form of thinking, but thankfully I had my novel to pour it all out on.  I mean, it was a blessing in disguise.  I was able to tap into the emotions I felt and apply it to my character who had just lost the love of his life and didn't know how to go on, or is even certain if he wants to go on at all.

So yeah, my character has this great tone to him right from the beginning of the novel.  He's rude, inconsiderate, and just plain mean sometimes.  My friend Rachel would say, "sounds a lot like you," (haha) and occasionally she'd be right.  Then you see how hurt this guy, John, is and how much he loved life and felt so betrayed by it.  He really doesn't hate living.  He hates the unseen force that is life or rather death, but he doesn't distinguish between the two.

I mean if you've ever had the feeling that you just couldn't catch a break in life... bam!  That's John Noah... the poor guy.  You can't help but feel sorry for him. You want to help him.  You want to root for him, but at the same time you want to just watch and see what he does because he makes some interesting choices that makes you wonder, would I do the same?